Men can be feminist and they should be.
Patriarchy hits women more but indirectly men are also vulnerable. ' तुम क्यूं रो रहे? ये तो लड़कियां करती है'. Such statement is heard everywhere. This approach has effected men. They lose their emotional literacy. The emotional trunk of men is closed somewhere and this 'somewhere' should be talked about , why? To understand men's state of mind and mental health.The contemporary feminist talk about men problems and there trauma. Some of the problems,
They hide their emotions.
Restrictive clothing and behaviour.
Men being abused and raped is seldom talked about.
In contrast, patriarchy instils masculinity. This creates hierarchy in men. One adhering to hyper masculine traits, other not. What is hyper masculinity? An Indian film dialogue defines, hyper masculine men as, 'Mard ko dard nhi hota.' And this cult of masculinity defines men, not to be sissy, no pink, short hair, definite clothing, oak stud(strong), ambitious, burden of finance and etc…. Such set standards has effected men's pshyce. They have become toxic, and insensitive. I don't say, all men are like this, but majority of men espouse such traits and distance themselves from emotion. They hide emotions so well that most suicides in India and across globe is done by men. Why is it so? Is not patriarchy snatching men's emotional literacy?
Patriarchy has hitted hard to this sex. Unknowingly, to attain power they have become tool. We have heard of fatherhood. How fatherhood burdens men?
Only few times, had seen my father crying. If anytime he showed his heavy heart. All of us in family feel demised. Why is he sad? Why he is crying? What should I do to make him happy? This is a natural feeling. Everyone has this. But in case, my mother is sad and crying, I don't feel same. Yes, I feel bad. However, the intensity of emotion is not same. You must be thinking why I am sharing this? There's a reason. We never take men's grief normal. This has to be unlearned. A man should be encouraged to share feelings and grief. Why he has to keep everything inside? To perform fatherhood perfection. It's ok to be broken and imperfect. And hiding emotion isn't manly.So, as a human, unlearning is important. Unlearning fixed traits and behaviour. Why one sex has to be strong and other weak? Anyone can be anything. I mean to say be yourself and reject cult traits.
Don't say ,'Man up'. This is harmful.